Air Force Featured Stories

Contributions ease stress in time of need

  • Published
  • By Master Sgt. Stefanie Doner
  • Air Force Flight Test Center Public Affairs
For more than 22 years, nearly the whole of my professional life, I have never defaulted on a loan, been late with a payment or needed help to pay my bills. I'm quite proud of that achievement. However, a serious family illness 18 months ago put me face to face with an emotional and financial challenge I didn't quite know how to handle. I will be eternally grateful for the help I received through the Air Force Assistance Fund.

My hero, my dad, had been fighting what we were beginning to realize was a losing battle against malignant melanoma -- skin cancer -- for nearly three years. We had exhausted nearly every treatment option available and were left with more drastic measures. Since my dad's cancer was believed to be isolated in his leg, he qualified for a risky procedure being evaluated by University of Pennsylvania Medical Center in Philadelphia. Although his medical insurance would cover the surgery and other related costs, it couldn't help with travel expenses or lodging and food costs.

Because of his condition, my dad couldn't fly or take a bus or train. The only way he could travel was to lie down on the back seat of the car under strong pain medication. Even then, many stops would be required before reaching his destination. My mother can't drive. I needed to get from California to their home in western New York, then drive them both to Philadelphia. Once there, it would be at least a two-week stay. Plane tickets to New York I could handle, and I'd left my trusty station wagon with my parents because I thought it would be easier for my dad to drive than his full-size pickup.

Gas, food and hotel costs were an entirely different matter. Someone suggested I visit the Air Force Aid Society representative at the family support center.

The Air Force Aid Society is one of four charities supported by Air Force Assistance Fund contributions. It's the first place I would have suggested a subordinate go for help in a similar situation, but I never even considered it for myself. Perhaps, because I'm a master sergeant, I figured I should be able to handle it alone. Nothing is further from the truth. We all need help sometimes, and it's good to know there's a place to turn.

I made an appointment to speak with the AFAS representative. I filled out some paperwork, got Red Cross confirmation of the emergency back home and, that same day, I had a check in my hand in the form of an interest-free loan.

Repaying the loan was easy. Finance deducted the monthly payment directly from my pay.

My dad's procedure, which consisted of 12 hours of surgery and a week in intensive care, was considered a success. Unfortunately, unknown to the medical team at the time, the cancer had already traveled beyond his leg and was soon spreading like wildfire throughout his body. Less than a year later a frantic phone call from home sent me flying back to New York. My dad was dying. Not even his doctors had anticipated his condition deteriorating so fast.

Four days later, my dad was gone. Mom was an emotional wreck, and I found myself in charge of making funeral arrangements and settling his affairs. I didn't know where to begin. We thought we'd have more time. Dad's illness had eaten up almost all his assets, as well as a portion of mine. His modest funeral would cost just under $5,000 and, together, we could raise less than half that amount. The funeral home didn't do payment plans nor would they take a credit card. Once again, I turned to Air Force Aid. Once again, my family got the help it needed when we needed it most.

I dearly wish my circumstances had a happier ending. Not a day goes by that I don't miss my dad. It was his encouragement, as well as his enthusiastic interest in aviation and the Air Force, that prompted me to first enlist and then remain in the Air Force for more than 20 years. But I will never forget the relief I felt when I knew I would be able to pay for the funeral my father deserved. Nor will I forget how the contributions my fellow airmen made to the Air Force Assistance Fund helped make this most stressful time in my life just a little easier to bear. Thank you.